I have started a new journey. There is something inside of me that I do not understand, this drive that does not allow me to settle for anything but to be true to myself, and so I am pursuing a dream that has both inspired and frightened me since the first time I seriously considered it at the age of 16 - being a pilot.
The recent rebirth of this goal started during the summer when my motorcycle was no longer fast or big enough to be anything of a challenge to me. I would take it to the tallest mountains that it could handle and wish to go further, higher. Not wanting to become sidetracked from school though I decided to push through until I at least had my transfer degree - but this is becoming impossible. Not only do my classes seem like a waste of time when there is sunshine in the sky and I could be logging hours, but school is no longer a challenge when I could be doing something - in my eyes - greater; something like flying.
This week I had to stop and reevaluate my motives. What is it, I wondered, that inhibits me from committing to finishing school as I planned? I want to stay focused but maybe a change of focus is okay? I went through every option, every outcome at least a dozen times and I decided that it is all relative...life continues and it will continue but unless I do that which is burning in me to do: to be free of everything I do not understand and follow myself into the unknown, until then I will not be satisfied.
So, I'm applying to become a student of flight. Its scary to me and I know I will need the support of my friends to become the best that I can be, but I am confident that with you I will succeed. I've had various friends who have given me little pushes along the way so far to take the steps to actually start this process - my sister Kendra has been my biggest cheer leading squad ...she even went with me to the aviation medical doctor to get my examination because I was so nervous. Tomorrow I hand in my application and shall wait to see what happens... we shall see... we shall see.